Deja vu

I found myself once again curled up in an armchair inside Barnes and Noble reading Sandman. I say that I found myself because I tend to get lost in those stories. I used to lose myself all the time but it happened less and less as I got older. Maybe it was because I read less fantasy, or went outside more, or something tangible like that. But no, I think as I developed my own view of the world, I also grew reluctant to accept the many things that didn't fit into it. At least where literary works were concerned. I still saw no problem with a movie where a man is beaten up by his possessed hand and then cuts it off with a chainsaw, or a girl that accidentally summons up the Goblin King to kidnap her little brother, or even a man with scissors instead of hands. It was all good, as long as someone else could show it to me. Really, I just got lazy.



Siblings and Speed Dial

My little brother, Luis, called me three times today. I was honestly pretty annoyed. He's good at calling when it is inopportune for me to talk. He usually doesn't want anything in particular, just to know where I am or what I'm doing. But for the past couple of weeks, he would call once, maybe twice a day. "Three times," I thought, "is just too much." I almost got mad. "Why is he all-of-a-sudden calling me all the time now?" Once I thought about it, I found the answer.
The boy has gotten used to seeing me.

Before when I was working my regular hours, I would see him about once a week. We would usually go out to eat, hang out, or rent a movie. Now since I've not been working, I see him just about every day. I have been spending much more time at my parent's house just hanging out, trying to remember what it was that I used to do when I actually lived there, that long year ago. And yeah, it isn't always the most exciting place to be.

And when I think that there are several people that I often call more than once a day, his behavior suddenly becomes...appropriate. I'm his friend, and when he is calling to see "what I'm doing" he's sort of seeing if I'm planning to come by the house. Maybe see him. Maybe joke around with him. Maybe even get him out of the house. On an e-mail survey Beth Froehlich sent me over a year ago, I answered the question "Who is your best friend?" with "Luis, because I know I can get him to do something with me anytime." I put that partly to cop out of being forced to choose just one friend and partly because it is true. It's still true. And I don't want that to change. Lousy family, getting me all sentimental. And making me realize that all it took to turn irritating into endearing was the tiniest shift in perspective.

Advice, unsolicited.

"A storyteller that doesn't tell stories is nothing." I read that today. And yet, here I sit, one of the many that still manage to convince themselves on a daily basis that we are hopelessly mired on this side of Creation.