"He looked up from his work to find that he was the only one in the office wearing pants.  Cursing his forgetfulness, he unbuckled his belt and kicked himself free of his denim constraints.  Pants-Down Fridays seemed to be arriving sooner every week.  He made a mental note to finish putting on the rhinestone lettering on his underwear.  At the moment, it read 'Pants-Do.'  People around the office recognized the beginning of their favorite phrase, but the rest of the world remained largely ignorant.  Soon, he thought, I'll finish these underwear and the world will know."

Jaden is in San Francisco today so all of us are going to have to pick up the slack.  Remember, only you can not wear pants on Fridays.  

And on this particular Friday, I'm not wearing pants for two.

With great power comes great responsibility.


*    *    *    *    *

I've decided to enter this writing contest.  I haven't submitted anything I've written to anything more prestigious than my high-school literary magazine, and nothing else since.  I'd appreciate suggestions.  If there is anything anyone may have read that stands out enough to be quasi-publishable, I'd appreciate the help.

Also, if there is anything that should never again see the light of day, just finish this sentence and turn it in at the end of the day:  "For the love of Cheebus, don't even think about sending in that ____  about  ____!"

Here's an example:  "For the love of Cheebus, don't even think about sending in that POEM about NOT BEING UNDERSTOOD!"

See, it's easy.  And fun!    

Today at work:

Nicole:  [yelling over wall of cubicle]  Hey!  Did you finish watching Strongbad?

Me: [painfully aware that internet use is prohibited and hoping my boss isn't within earshot]  I don't know what you're talking about.

*   *   *

Later, when boss is out of earshot:

Me: [singing]  I got mad at Nicole/ For screwing up the Strongbad caper/ Hope I don't see her name in the paper...
 

We are online.

I love my laptop. Since I moved back home, my laptop has been more neglected than Michael Moore's Ab-Roller. Yesterday, I purchased a wireless internet card.

Oh, it's on.

The calm before the storm; the strange that sets the norm. I don't know what that means, but I'm wireless now so I don't care.

I have been having a fulfilling weekend. Friday evening (during which I shuffled around pant-less without my usual energy because I had only slept 45 minutes the night before) I went to a party at Dana's. It was fun and something of a special occasion because all four Lopez children that are of or near legal drinking age were there.

I feel good. Just thought I'd throw that out there.

Saturday night, Beth and I went over to have dinner with everybody's favorite newly-weds, Jake and Heather. They had decided to go against thousands of years of tradition and we all sat down to a delicious dinner of pancakes, eggs, bacon, juice, and peanut butter and banana.

It was a little disturbing to hear the dry, rattling sound of Cornelious von Omelet (the man who invented breakfast) rolling in his grave, but other than that our meal was awesome.

After dinner, Jake, Heather, and I trekked down to the Valley Art Theater and caught What the $!@#? Do We Know?. The film is astounding.

For a movie about quantum physics, it was almost painfully engaging.

I would have given my left hand for a pause button to give me a moment to pick up the pieces of my blown mind from among the spilt popcorn and discarded straw wrappers.

For instance, when the film showed a boy bouncing a basketball and then when on to explain that the ball never actually touches the ground (the electrons in the ball and the ground repel each other before they come into contact.)

Listening to people that have devoted their lives to figuring things out and the conclusions they have drawn (indeed, are still trying to draw)is not as humbling as I thought it would be. There was a lot of "Hey, I've thought about that too!"

The film does drag at parts, but I found it to be the most informative, satisfying, and frustrating two hours I've ever spent. It's a good thing my tummy was full of pancake.

The film takes pieces of the world and puts many of them together. Then, it presents the almost-complete picture to you.

I loved it.

I recommend going to see the film and then deciding for yourself.