Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Into The Baby Land
Chapter XI: The Ivory Guardians

And truly, as the chyldes did observe the picture-device, I did steal awhile into the kitchen that I may seek succor, as is my wont about mid-day. Into the Hydrogen-Exciter did I thrust a plate of Rice and Bean, as is common to many that are Mexicans. As the Foods did so become heated inside the white box, lo! A wail did come from that room that housed the picture-device.

And so round came Joshua Remy, the Twin, the sure source of that woeful cry. I made as if to go to him, but lo! Another wail, at first thought I that of the Twin Ender, as to my ears it was a hearty cry, he being the stouter of the Two.

Thus made I haste upon to the Viewing Room and there did I espy the Guest Chyldes that were given to my care for a short time each Daye. The Girl the Older sat upon the sofa couch and did merely watch, as she was wont, her Nature much given to musing. The Boy of the Youngers did brace a grubsome arm against the screen of the picture-device, and then my mind came to know the source of the Second Wailing.

Lo! Ender, Twin to Joshua Remy (though seeming much dis-alike as an apple to an orange-fruit) had his teeth locked about the Boy Chyld's arm in a fierce-some bite! And though the Boy, franticked, did wave his arm thus to and again fro, could not for all his Wrigglings dislodge Ender the Twin.

This I beheld in but an instant as I swooped to scoop up the battle-furyed Ender the Twin. No words of comfort nor scolding did I voice, but did I clutch him to me in a firm and gentle Way that is known to me. Nor did I give punishment or word of mislike, as in truth mine heart was swolled with a strange pride to see him defend his Twin in such a manner.

Ender the Twin wept, doubtless believing a cause for grievance, that I nuzzled him and made likewise to scoop up Joshua Remy the Twin, who did stand near a-sniffling and with sad mewings. I held both up and did praise them with my Mind Elements and place them in a Higher Regard as to their standing in my heart.

Unfortunate Twins as I had thought them oft, for no true father did they have, save an uncle half-mad and availed of only Incomplete Learnings from Schools of Questionable Repute. Yet, as I have given such an example, their fraternity would be unequaled in this lifetime. Brothers have I had and have I still, yet our Learnings of the World did come uneven upon us, such as that one walked when the other could yet not, and so forth in all ways of growing.

At this tyme I did Know that e'er any should strike the one, they would meet the teeth of the other, thus in all Considerings must their foes make account for two Champions, though their Quarrel be with One or the Other.

Thus hope did swell in my breast and I knew despair for their Future no longer, as when someday the Full Madness does come upon me, the Twins might still look to each for succourity.

As for the Meal aforementioned and thus alluded to, I found it coldened upon my return, yet not to the point of dis-pleasantness, but of such a Temperature as to release the Savors and not yet scald the tongue that doth taste of it.

As for the Boy Chyld that did sustain the Twinful wrath, he grew to a deathly pallor and gained a chill like the interior of the De-heatinating Box in which we of that time stored Perishables. Desperately wont was he for the Anti-Bioticks, which did reside down the lane at the Apothecary-Mart, for which I could not be troubled to journey at that time. Thus, he died, and I did return the coins allotted by his Rearers to secure his care for that Daye, and none went away dis-pleasured, yet perhaps the Musing Girl whose thoughts are difficult to fathom did come to trouble at the loss of her brother-Chyld, perhaps not. This is the only mystery that remains with me of that Daye.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

This is a call to assemble, my fellow rogues, vagabonds, and sometimes-do-wells.

We will be breaking into the top secret LEGO vault.

Once inside, we will all grab our favorite sets and then, of course, have them battle it out. Imagine the glory as a Space Pirate blows up a mag-lev train carrying knights on horseback while archers return fire from the backs of dragons while firetrucks race to rescue the wounded. Then, quake with fear as the Star Wars LEGO Death Star and T.I.E. fighters come into view, causing former enemies to band together to face this new threat to all.

Oh yeah, and it will all be set on a medieval world that rests on four massive TECHNIC race cars all going full-tilt along a giant racetrack.

It will be the most epic LEGO battle in the history of the LEGO world.

Just as soon as I find the secret vault. The location is written in only one place: the back of the Constitution of the United States. But screw that; I bet it's somewhere in Denmark.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Secret shame.

I'm a man who has hated himself on many occasions, but this instance blows them all out of the water.

One of them is Hannah Montana's brother. But man, some of those kids can dance. The prep school kids are probably my favorite...

I just threw up in my mouth.

Yea, the young Gurg did go forth into the market and thereupon made haste to the machines that did draw power from ionic current (not included).

And lo, he did exchange currencie for a light-capture device, and a spirit tablet that when provoked by a majik rod, doth draw many a stick figure upon the light-screen.

And verily did the devices burrow mightily into the creative centres within his brain, and the sticky mind-sap did trickle forth, which upon distillation, yielded an amber sweetness.

Eh, yes, I got a Bamboo drawing tablet and a Canon Powershot. How sweet it is.
I'm in the process of putting together a mighty work station with computer, typewriter, letter-writing, music, coffee maker, and easy access to dried mango slices.

The only other stuff in my room will be a bed and a fan. This is how I want to live.
I will make it so.