Sunday, March 06, 2016

Gurg has joined the room
(12:57) Gurg: Fashion is a cruel mistress, if mistress she be.
(13:00) Gurg: Long has the human head gone adorned and un-adorned. Earliest recorded instances of hat-wearing is found in the Babylonian temples erected in 1975, with crude cave-drawings depicting human-like shapes with large crescents upon their brows.
(13:02) Gurg: It is unlikely they were comfortable, and most hat-scholars agree that they were not so. However, there is no serious academic that can deny they don't look damn good.
Invited benO
Invited libstrom
Libstrom has joined the room
Ben has joined the room
(13:05) Libstrom: Interesting
(13:05) Ben: We should bring back the egyptian pharoh hat. That looks comfortable and boss.
(13:06) Ben: Also, the historical phrenologists agree that crecent people of Urdu/Babylon had no need for hats.
(13:07) Gurg: Friezes upon the Great Wall of Appalachia, artifically aged to appear over 3,000 years old, depict a caste system in which the lower-castes were forced to wear more and more hats as the upper-casts could not possibly don the great multitude of hats were forever ordering from the hat-making-caste.
(13:07) Gurg: It was a vicous, jaunty cycle.
(13:08) Ben: *edit Urdu is a language from a completely different area. Ur was the city from Mesopotamia.
(13:08) Libstrom: I am not knowledgeable enough to comment
(13:08) Gurg: The hat is its own language.
(13:08) Gurg: PERFECT!
(13:08) Ben: I am hat-illiterate.
(13:09) Gurg: I think you can change the topic, if you wish.
(13:09) Libstrom: Hmmm....
(13:10) Ben: I'm the topicoligist here! Are you licenced to guide discourse?
(13:13) Libstrom: I just said something out loud that sounded very bad
(13:14) Libstrom: "The only way for her not to be a stranger is if she comes."
(13:14) Libstrom: >.<
(13:14) Ben: lol
(13:14) Gurg: She better bring a hat.
(13:15) Libstrom: I'm dying laughing right now
(13:17) Libstrom: Ok I'm done dying now...please continue...
(13:17) Ben: I'm imagining a yellow rain hat, like for a fisherman.
(13:18) Gurg: See, I was thinking of those Dutch hats. The really tall cone ones.
(13:19) Ben: lol
(13:20) Libstrom: In Isabel and I's conversation the sentence was perfectly normal....but, leave it to me to take it out of context.
(13:21) Gurg: Quit taking it out.
(13:22) Libstrom: I need a hat
(13:23) Libstrom: In other news....
(13:25) Ben: Stimulus package.
(13:32) Gurg: In the late 1800s, the denuding of the forests and overfarming of the land created massive swaths of bare earth. Exacerbated by a decade of drought, the autumnal high winds swept the plains mercilessly. This was known as "The Hatless Time."
(13:33) Libstrom: Now I know how Penny feels
(13:33) Ben: I think we should be bullish about the Amazon, we burned and farmed North America to within an inch of its life.
(13:35) Gurg: No thank you Ma'amazon.
(13:35) Gurg: The cursed river flows two directions, despite every law of physics decrying it.
(13:37) Ben: Is this the Illinois river connected to the Missisipi?
(13:38) Gurg: Ben, this is Searching4Truth, not DoneFoundTheTruth.
(13:38) Libstrom: hahahahahahahaha
(13:39) Gurg: Everything I say is a lie.
(13:39) Ben: We should do a live action version of the famous paradox.
(13:40) Gurg: Maybe we're already not doing it right now.
(13:40) Ben: I wouldn't know what you aren't talking about.
(13:41) Libstrom: :-\ I'm not knowledgeable enough to comment
(13:41) Ben: Stop being down on yourself! #libbyisawesome
(13:41) Gurg: I don't believe you.
(13:42) Libstrom: I don't believe him either...
(13:42) Libstrom: #Libbyissometimesawesome
(13:45) Gurg: A Slovakian communications satellite was knocked out of orbit by a grapefruit sized chunk of space debris. As it fell to Earth, its scanners picked up extremely high levels of awesome in the vicinity of Libby. It found some comfort in this, and transmitted the information to Alpha Palmetto, a distant binary galaxy. It felt no fear as it crashed into the red dirt of the Namibian desert, frightening a local goat.
(13:46) Libstrom: Hopefully not a fainting goat...
(13:47) Gurg: The goat did not comment, as it had fainted.
(13:47) Libstrom: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
(13:48) Ben: Where were the Checklo in all this?
(13:48) Gurg: And fell into a goat-sized bed. When it awoke, goat milk and cookies were on the tiny night stand next to it. Then work called and told the goat to take the day off to focus on goat stuff.
(13:49) Ben: You just yell like a man and eat garbage. Chill.
(13:51) Gurg: The Checklo could be reached for comment, but refused to speak in any known language. They would only click the knob of an ancient black-and-white TV set. Every channel showed Fox News.
(13:51) Gurg: The TV's power cord dangled in the red dust, plugged into nothing.
(13:52) Ben: I plug the power cord into a grapefruit.
(13:52) Libstrom: Some people say that humans should not drink other animals milk because it's not natural, and they use the example that cows don't drink goat milk...but, in all reality, how often does a cow have the opportunity to drink a goat's milk?
(13:53) Gurg: You are turned into a sky whale. Is this awesome? Y/N
(13:53) Ben: Y!
(13:53) Ben: I mount the sky whale, excelsior!
(13:54) Ben: I think some people do drink goat milk, libby, or at least make cheese.
(13:54) Ben: And if it isn't natural, how come my genes make lactase, an enzyme specifically made to digest milk? That's pretty damn natural.
(13:55) Gurg: You receive the +5 Baleen of Baleful Blades. Super-effective against ogres and mournful dirges.
(13:55) Gurg: Humans naturally put everything in their mouth.
(13:55) Ben: lol, too true.
(13:56) Libstrom: Oh
(13:56) Libstrom: I see.
(13:56) Gurg: Consider the lobster.
(13:56) Libstrom: I thought this was going somewhere else...sorry
(13:56) Libstrom: please continue