Mollie: "Life is strange."

Guillermo: "It's the strangest thing I know."

Things are looking up. My friend Gabe has repaired my laptop and this badboy is now fully functional. Or, as functional as it was just before it stopped working entirely. Still no sound or video capability, but that's just as well because I would log on to Youtube and never be seen again.

I've set up my room to utilize my writing desk. I'm hoping to create the proper environment so that I can roll out of bed all pantsless and hack out whatever's on my mind. I mean, that's the whole idea, right?

The animated musical of Charlotte's Web is playing behind me. Templeton and the goose just got done singing about the joys of the fair. It was amazing.

I must go to work in about an hour. I think I may leave the pet store soon. I've enjoyed my time there but my iron will is starting to bend. I adopted an older ferret, ended up keeping a couple of the hamsters, and gave Brian a couple of rats for his birthday. Including the previous ferret and the leopard gecko, we now have seven pets. I named the new ferret Lendri and the rats are named The Notorious R.A.T. and Rattie Smalls.

In other news, I've discovered Google News. I use it all the time, but I just learned that I can personalize it. Now, my news page comes up with news on War, Energy, Evolutionary Theory, Nanotechnology, Biology, AZ Government, Evolutionary Psychology, Literature, and Science Fiction.

Mwahahaha.

Google news is great because it links to several articles about the same topic. It's interesting to compare the biases and writing styles of different new sources. The only way to read news provided you have the time.

I can't quite run yet. My knees haven't hurt at all for a couple of days, but I'm still trying to be careful. Everyone keeps warning me about "permament damage." I don't think the term is entirely accurate. It will probably only hurt until I die.

I'm eager to run a marathon that isn't full of hills and valleys sculpted in the devil's sandbox. Let me at that level ground and you'll see what kind of damage I can do.

I'm recovering nicely from the marathon. I can't quite run yet, but I can walk easily and negotiate stairs without too much trouble. The last marathon I ran had me hobbling around for a week and I wasn't able to run without pain for a few months. Perhaps there is something to be said for "preparation" and "training."

I was dissappointed with my time of five hours and 50 minutes. It was even longer than my last marathon time. Further reviewal of the results showed that the best time was 3 hours and 17 minutes. This is about an hour longer than the insane pro marathon runners completed the Rock and Roll Marathon. From this I induce that this race is more difficult even for experienced runners. Also, it said as much on the pamphlet given to me before the race.

Here is a picture of me in pain at the finish line. I didn't wear the pirate hat because it would have been too hot but instead I wore a necklace made of twine, jangly copper washers, and a ceramic skull.

The necklace snapped a quarter mile into the race and I carried the skull in my hand the rest of the way.

Beno did not wear a pirate hat or wear a pirate necklace but we both had pirate flags that we pinned onto our backs. I'll put those pictures up as soon as my roommate pays the internet bill.

In Ever-Closer-To-Shuffling-Off-This-Mortal-Coil News:

My birthday is this Friday. I will be 24 years old, which is the perfect age for something but I forget what. My family has asked what I would like for a present. Since my little brother Luis reads my blog, I figured I would just list it here. This years theme will be stuff I used to love but sorta forgot about:

1. Pearl Jam's new album.
2. Tool's new album.
3. Science (in green.)
4. Edward Scissorhands (I've had two copies but I keep loaning them out and never getting them back. That's what I get for sharing das love.)
5. Impact Suit.


Getting any of these items would make me incredibly happy, as depicted here by this hastily crafted artist's rendition:



Now if you'll excuse me, I have a paper to write.

We're back. We're alive. We finished the race in 5:50.

There were chicken wings at the finish line. Well worth it.

Yar indeed.

Beno and I are about to leave for Prescott. It is an arduous two hour journey filled with snacks, backseat driving, and blasting tunes from a ghetto jambox that we're bringing along because we don't have one a dem fancy in-car cd players.

In "Nothing-Without-Pants-Gets-Past-Jaden News," our long-standing tradition of Pants-Down Friday has been usurped and confined to a single day a year. Blasphemy! Studies show that pants can be down multiple times a week without lasting harm to anyone. Fridays are just mandatory because, much like eating and drinking, if you don't do it at least once a week you will probably die.

To raise awareness of Pants-Down Friday, I will be running the marathon devoid of underwear and in a chintzy pirate hat. I was going to go as a ninja, but my costume is so good that I would start and finish the race and no one would ever realize it ever. The costume is very good. And thorough.

So pirate it is. Maybe next year I'll run as a zombie.

And remember, Cinco De Mayo is Spanish for...Cinco of Mayo. It is also the Mexican Day of Pantalones-Dropping.

Love,

"Having never done anything illegal in his life, he was startled to understand, all of a sudden, that a ruthless constabulary was a crucial resource to more imaginative sorts of criminals, such as himself."

-The Diamond Age by Neal Stephenson

Great book so far.

Ah, the marathon draws near. I am now entering that holiest of times before a race in which I have full license to devour any complex carbohydrates that come within a 15 foot radius of me.

Not that I didn't really before, but I usually asked first, and I was polite about it. Now I just stuff my face and if pressed I gesture towards my Gurg Gorging Permit which is a yellow half-sheet of paper that I taped to my chest. It also doubles as a bib.

This is what I have to deal with every day at work. Adorable pets with big doe-eyes that look up at me and whisper "Take me home" as soon as everyone else is out of earshot.

I'm getting better at hardening my heart. But sometimes I wonder if it's really worth it.