It's happened again. My dog, The Noobers, is infested with babies. I'll have to pick up one of those collars for him.

Ender's Druish training is coming along swimmingly. He has learned to say the name of the Druish All-Parent, "Hesheh" [hee-shay] and his next lesson was to never say the name of the All-Parent. Not allowed.

His second lesson is still a bit of a struggle. I'm trying to explain that everything in existence is Hesheh, and everything that is Hesheh is in existence. If it's something besides those two it isn't Hesheh or in existence. It's known as the mystery of the Holy Finity. I guess it's like being a cell in the body. Hesheh may not know the thoughts of each individual cell, but if Hesheh places its mighty hand upon a hot plate, Hesheh will be aware of the suffering of a large amount of cells because those cells are Hesheh. Hesheh just gets a little distracted sometimes.

The third lesson is the Midsummer Night's Whooping. Every year, Hesheh sends down a false prophet to speak against the Druish people. The Druish people ignore his prosthelytizing for 7 days and 7 nights and then on Midsummer's Eve they all band together and whoop the crap out of the false prophet.

The most important part of this lesson is that when referring to the person who was beaten, Druish people must say "they" beat him as if it happened a long time ago and we had nothing to do with it. Like when talking to the police. Especially when talking to the police.

Druish diet restrictions are easy to figure out. Aside from avoiding the unclean spig, they also can't eat any food that is on fire.

The Druish religion is renowned for being practical and useful.