Tuesday, November 18, 2003

I've been up for something like 23 hours. Radiohead is playing. I find myself...here.

But what is this place? I get lost so easily, it seems. I'm never where I'm expected to be. Perhaps tied in somehow with the frustrating thing. I'd better make a not to take a closer look at that later.

At work today we had a "training" class that dealt with values the company would like us to hold. We were given a list of values,( i.e., teamwork, excellence, efficiency, honesty, intelligence,) and told to individually rank what we thought to be the five most important ones.

Most people put down "Honesty" as their number one value.

I chose "Learning."

We were then placed in small groups and told that we were to rank the values again as a group. Everyone else in my group had chosen "Honesty," for their number one as well, but I was not going to let them have it without a fight. I brought up the point that during World War II, some people hid Jewish people in their homes. When questioned by the Nazis, these people lied and said they were not hiding Jews.

In other words, not being honest.

I got to keep my learning as the group #1.

Then my group expected to slip "Honesty" in at #2, but I successfully argued that "Integrity" was still more appropriate.

My group wasn't very happy with me, I think.

Oh yeah, my top three were Learning, Integrity, and Innovation.

Not that honesty isn't important to me. I almost never lie. I usually avoid the question. If I'm directly confronted, I usually just don't answer.

Here is some dialogue from today:

Angelica (co-worker): So do you go by William, or Guillermo?

Me: Honestly, it depends where I am.

Angelica: Well, what do you prefer to be called?

Me: I prefer to go by Guillermo.

Angelica: So does Denee (another co-worker) call you William or Guillermo?

Me: That's funny, I don't know what she calls me. I don't really notice what she calls me, it just sort of fixes itself in my head.

I have two names, William and Guillermo. I was supposed to get dual citizenship when I was born, but I guess that never happened. I ended up with a birth certificate that said "William Bryce Lopez," and a social security card that read "Guillermo Brice Lopez."

But as far as I knew, I was Guillermo. When I tried to get my driver's license, I was informed that I wasn't who I thought I was. It was all very confusing.

So now I run around introducing myself to the people at work and school as William. But I'm still Guillermo, I think.

Heh heh, don't tell William. He's kind of uptight. And don't call him Willy, he hates that.

Whoever I am, I need to rest. Goodnight, Radiohead. Goodnight, noon.

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