Ah yes, the journal. The voice of the past and present, to myself in the future. 

I blame smart phones for all my problems. They're incredible machines. And yet, I lived so much more when it was much easier to get bored. 

I do wonder how my brain has changed. When i got my ADHD diagnosis years ago, I thought, "That makes sense" and took my medication and went about my business. 

It was only recently, when trying to help my friend understand their own ADHD diagnosis, that I started listening to lectures on YouTube about the emotional response many people, especially adults, have when they get their diagnosis. 

It's like you've been racing in a rowboat your whole life and never winning, then you find out that everyone else had a motor in theirs. 

I didn't exactly feel that way. At least I don't think I did.

But I say... That I have to go buy some Christmas presents and it's not something I want to do but my headlight is out so it's better to go during the day. Also I need to order a new headlight. And learn how to replace it. Are halogen lights good? I kind of hate them but if they help me see that would be good even though I would know it annoys other people like me. 

Decision time.