Me: Hey, Mr. Sun!

Sun: Who are you?

Me: My name is Guillermo! I just wanted to tell you that sunrise was bitchin!

Sun: Gee, thanks.

Me: Can you teach me how to wake up like that? I want to be all majestic and awe-inspiring.

Sun: Do you humans have nuclear bombs yet?

Me: Oh boy, do we!

Sun: Then shove one up your ass and wire it to your snooze button.

Me: Ha ha, you're funny!

Sun: Look, um, Gwuh...Goo...Gully...what is your name again?

Me: William.

Sun: Yeah, okay, William. I gotta go, you know, I'm kinda on a schedule.

Me: Where are you going?

Sun: Over there.

Me: What's over there?

Sun: I will be, if you ever shut up.

Me: Ha ha, you're funny. Are you following the moon?

Sun: No, I am not following the moon.

Me: Why not? She's hot.

Sun: You're trying to be funny.

Me: I'm not trying to be anything. I just want to know what's going on between you two.

Sun: If you don't understand gravity, kid, I don't have time to explain it to you.

Me: Is it that simple?

Sun: Gravity is simple, he says. Let me see you calculate where I'm going to be in 10 hours and then tell me it's simple.

Me: I thought you said you would be over there.

Sun: Oh, we're clever, are we? Well, you just earned yourself an extra dose of UV rays.

Me: Thanks, but don't worry about it. I have to go to bed soon.

Sun: Must be a rough life you lead, Gwilliamo.

Me: I wouldn't call it that.

Sun: I would expect you to call it sarcasm.

Me: Huh?

Sun: Go to bed, kid.

Me: But laws of attraction, that's what you're saying?

Sun: Right. There are laws.

Me: Hmm. Is it possible to break these laws?

Sun: Perhaps. You can certainly try. Although, from what I've seen, you'll probably be torn apart, or at least lose a great deal of mass.

Me: Oh. Are those my only options?

Sun: No. Under the right circumstances, you could change into something else entirely.

Me: That's neat. Like what?

Sun: Depends on what's already in you, kid.

Me: I had a quesadilla for dinner.

Sun: ...Yeah, you know what, then you're good. Seriously though, I have to go. I guarantee you there are some really pissed-off farmers right now.

Me: Oh, okay. Hey, do you want me to tell the moon anything for you?

Sun: No.

Me: You want me to tell her no?

Sun: Wow. Goodnight, kid.

Me: Goodnight!