Today in Gurg News:

I broke my productive streak of writing something every day. Not that it is going to end here. I'm gonna take a sabbatical, (or whatever it is you call a vacation when you aren't even employed at the moment.)

Updates:

My car is running again. It was the starter, as I suspected. And it cost a little over $100 dollars, as I feared.

I'm still working out. I forgot what Day # it is, but that's not really important. I can't find my Nintendo-mix CD, which is odd because I have been walking around clutching that thing to me like a kid holds his beloved teddy bear.

I haven't been drunk. Well, since about two weekends ago. I haven't wanted to, really, since I started spending a lot more time writing. Hmm...so I guess this is something of an experiment. Or as I like to call it "An Investigative Report."

I will soon have a job. Unless of course, I'm betrayed by my urine.

And our top story of the week:

I'm confused as all hell. But wait, that was last week's top story. Oh, and the week before that. And the week before that. And the week before that...