Many years have long since passed since one of the most important milestones in my days as a young pizza-parlor-frequenting boy. I know everyone never forgets their first time, and I am no exception. But how many remember how many quarters they had to save up for it?

I am of course referring to the first arcade game I ever beat. It was Capcom's Altered Beast. It was a sweet game. The goal was to fight your way through moonlit graveyards, treacherous caverns, and twisted evil dimensions to rescue the love of your life. (You could play alone or with two players, and I was old enough to realize that certain romantic obstacles might arise from two male heroes rescuing the damsel. I made up my own back story for the game, deciding that in any two-player game, whatever player I wasn't was the fair maiden's brother.)

So you would go around fighting zombies*, giant ants, and evil unicorns. The best part was that you could get magic orbs that would power you up until you turned into some kind of mythical creature, like a werewolf or a dragon. There was also the more obscure bear-that-turned-people-into-stone and high-jumping tiger. (Not as cool, but they got the job done.)

Well, I had beaten the final boss (as the Golden Werewolf) and sat back, unsure of what to expect. Then I watched amazed as the end of the story began to unfold...

There was me rescuing the princess! There she was turning back into a human! (She had been turned into a dove on my way to rescue her.) She runs into my werewolf arms and gazes deeply into my werewolf eyes!

CUT!

My character unzips his werewolf costume. A couple of gargoyles in the background hang from their strings. The cameramen grin and the sound guys gratefully lower their boom mikes. The director gathers the cast and crew together and they raise HUGE mugs of beer** triumphantly into the air to toast their achievement.

Roll credits.

I laughed and scampered off excitedly to tell my friends. A game where the characters are just actors? They would never believe it.

I got to relive that moment again last night at Brian Young's house. He has one of those video game emulators on his computer. All those games may very well be the death of me...
I guess I should add that to the list.

*I guess I wasn't afraid of zombies yet.

**Probably my earliest association ever of happiness with alcohol.