Went to see Avengers: Infinity War again. It's that good.

A friend recently told me I had an awesome attitude. I've been musing over it. I consider myself rather fussy. Another friend also told me I'm kind of an Eeyore, which seemed more accurate. There's a kind of pessimism, certainly, I consider a key component of my attitude. I could half-joke that I've already had the worst day of my life, and compared to that most days are pretty great. The difference between outright pessimism is the role of hope. I have expectations, primarily, and hope is when I wish for a particular expectation to be met. Like my worst day example, it's a statistical thing. Totally possible, just unlikely. So I don't worry too much about it.

Bad things happen, and I'm not in the school of thought that believes our attitude determines everything. As if maintaining a positive attitude will influence a past result. I don't know that I believe "attitude," as a concept, is even that useful. I assume most people want the best outcome for themselves all the time.

I guess my attitude is that it's amazing that things are going as well as they are, considering human beings as a whole experience a massive range of horror and despair on a daily basis. Most days I experience very little first-hand despair, and almost no horror.

Mostly, missing certain people is the most hurt I get. That's the wound that time can't heal, I guess.