Friday, April 13, 2018

Where the heck have I been? Actually busy. Yesterday was blustery as a mofo and my shade sails came down. It appears I'll have to bury the bases after all. Or make hella wider ones, which may defeat the purpose of minimizing the footprint. Still, I enjoy digging. I think I'll buy a new shovel today. One for digging deep.

I'm not sure why I'm so obsessed with shade right now. If I dare to look inward in my heart of hearts, I expect I'll find that after having dubbed my house "The Houndstooth" such as an old-tymey pub, the desire to earn the name has grown. White, triangular shade sails could appear to be teeth, you see. And massive statues of hounds in various states of repose can dot the front and backyard. Shit, I should construct hound heads, canine moai, and in their teeth will be rings to attach the sails to.

That would be neat. And yet, I am concerned about my obsession. Neglect the inside of the house while I focus on the outside. Really not sure what the heck I'm attempting to accomplish. The urge to change is strong when I'm away, then fades as I settle in. Am I being complacent, or are things actually pretty good already and I don't need to mess with anything.

My friend told me once that I was afraid of being happy. Even if she turns out to be right, I don't see how I could admit that.

So until I find resolution, I will dig. Dig deep, layer after layer, until I hit bedrock or my body fails me.

To the shovel emporium!

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