It's hard to understand past mindsets. I remember them; I remember being in them. Jokes.

So thoughts/material for Surly's roasts:

The best part of planning this roast is for the past 6 months I've been able to lie in bed at night just thinking about making fun of Matt. Whenever I have a stray moment, my thoughts turn to you. And your many, many flaws. In my minds eye I see a giant, shining, glorious, and completely nude Matt. I soar over him, probing him for weakness. (By the way, you're totally into it.)

I learned a lot. Mostly I realized it's easy to make fun of Surly, but it's hard to make fun of the real Matt. Sure, we all have that image of a scruffy kid in aviator sunglasses and a serial killer van, but he has been nothing but a good friend. Hardly serial-killed any of us.

I'm sure I'm not the only one that's been having this struggle. Half of us in here do comedy and entertainment, and a few of us are even good at it. NAME, you're not. Alan, your T-Rex impression was very funny in high school. Leah, you're pretty good but you're playing other people's music so I guess that doesn't count. Lauren...wait, do you do even do anything?

By the way I planned these jokes months ago. I wrote them on my blog, where I knew they would be secret and safe. You guys are just that predictable.

Non-material-wise, I'll probably have to get everyone's prepared jokes ahead of time, so I can kind of Family Feud them and make sure they aren't doing the same ones. I could mention that.